Savour Today, LIve it to the fullest!!

I'm sitting here at the Leadership Summit, day 2. I've listened to Wess Stafford, CEO of Compassion detail how he received his calling to champion children at the age of 9. I contrast this with myself, who at the age of 49 still wonders what my true calling really is. And the Lord whispers into my heart that my calling is to savour today. To do his work here and now, and to let tomorrow fend for itself. A familiar theme in my life these days, it would seem. I guess I'm rather thick and it takes a lot of reminders for it to sink in. But the truth of these simple words is unavoidable. Thank you Lord.

Last Tuesday's Question - follow up

Last Tuesday I posed a question. After a week of consideration and prayer, God did not show me any areas that weren't given over to him. My overall answer as of today is that I am trusting God with my life, just need to increase my trust overall, and continue relying on him more each day. A growth process...

On another note, I have had a huge answer to prayer this week. As some people know, I have been unhappy in my job for quite some time. I have wanted to get out of collections, but felt that God had me in my current job for his purposes. This has been a very strong conviction in my life - that God placed me with my current company 10 years ago and I was not to leave until he moved me. I was not to pursue a change. Well, yesterday I was given the opportunity to move to another department, doing a job I believe will be even more suited to my strengths and capabilities. This doesn't solve all of my issues at work, but goes a very long way. Thank you Lord for your continued guidance and love. I know you have some new tasks for me, as well as others that will continue despite the change. Help me to show your love and care to all I come in contact with today and every day...

Random Thoughts

Spiritual Gifts & Temperament

Yesterday I was browsing around on the net and decided to do some research on Pastor Rogers church. Most days I listen to one of Adrian Rogers podcasts as part of my devotional. (As an aside, I've realized I need to contribute to this ministry that has been such an influence over the past year or so in my life) Anyway, I know Pastor Rogers has passed away. The web for his podcast ministry has been set up separate from his old church, which is how it should be, but I got to thinking about that church. Where is it, who is the pastor now, etc. How is it doing with a new person in control. So, I thought I was doing some casual surfing. I should have known better!

As with everything, God's hand was on this too. Funny how we do all these things we think are casual, throwaway actions, but they are all under God's hand, protection and guidance. The bible tells us that our God knows the number of hairs on our head, but often we forget how great a thing that really is. Back to the story ... I track down the church and start browsing their website. On there, under Member Development, they have an online questionnaire for spiritual gifts and temperament. Now God knows that I did a spiritual gifts class, but that was a long time ago. I've heard that our spiritual gifts don't change but have wondered about that for a long time because I've changed so much since when I did that last class. Okay, maybe not so much change as matured, but as always, I wanted to see for myself.

When I took the class way back then, I had three strong gifting areas - Prophecy, Administration and Teaching. Yesterday my gifts showed up as Teaching and Administration. This makes sense to me. I believe the prophecy is still also a gifting, but one that God moves from foreground to background and back at different times in my life. I go through times when God shows me lots of things about the people and world around me, but then I go through other times when the focus is more on internal growth. The focus recently has been on internal growth, putting prophecy into the background.

While I really don't think of myself as a teacher, obviously God does and that is what is important, and administration is another area that just comes naturally like breathing to me. Even if I was to try and stifle it (which I have at times because I haven't wanted the responsibility), it just comes through anyway. Like telling my body I don't want to breathe today, a failed venture from the start.

Now, the most interesting part was the personality test. I'm doing this test, and it didn't seem to make much sense to me. You have to go through and number qualities in each box from 1-4, most unlike to most like yourself. I'm looking at some of the boxes thinking this couldn't possibly work because I'm really not like any of the traits in certain boxes. Oh, me of little faith ;-)

So I do the test and look at the results. My temperament is Melancholy. Okay, is this some kind of a joke? I know I can be moody at times, but I'm much better these days. I'm a happy person overall. When I look at life, I see the glass as half full. How can I be Melancholy? See, this test was definitely flawed! And then I read the description... Oh, me of little faith, it fit me to a T, both the strengths and weaknesses. In the end, it was an incredible encouragement from God, the start to another great day. How wonderful that God knows us and loves us each so well - right down to the number of hairs on my head, or the intricate details of ME - who I am and how he made me, not perfect but perfect for the tasks he sets before me... Thank you Lord!

Should anyone be reading this and wonder what their strengths and temperament are, simply ckick on the title of this post to go to the Member Development page of Belleview Church. On there you'll find the links to both their tests.

Tuesday Morning Question...

It's a Tuesday morning in July. I'm typing this on my new netbook, a great tiny, portable little thing. I just love it! except that they moved the left 'shift' key over so I have to think everytime I use it. Probably not a bad thing, over all.

We are in the midst of a full out house hunt, looking around an older area of Milton. We've seen some great homes, even to the point of putting in a couple of offers. But we haven't found the one God has picked out for us yet. It's exciting because we've seen some great homes and I know that the one God has for us is even greater than those we've seen. How exciting is that?

I've just finished my devotions for the morning and should really be getting ready for work now, but thought I'd take a minute and jot down a line or two.

My question for today is: Jesus, have I given you the keys to every area of my life?

My quick answer is 'of course I have', but there is a small voice inside that says - like my shift key, maybe I need to stop and think for a second before giving that quick answer. Have I really? So that is my question/request to God today. Lord, if there is an area I haven't surrendered, please show me so that I can hand you that key also. The bible and my experience over the past 25 years tells me that God is faithful and will answer. So I wait with anticipation....

Obeying God - and leaving the consequences to him

This May I turned 49, sitting on the brink of 50. I don't feel that old, truth be in my mind I feel about 10 years younger than that. But in many ways, the past month has been a turning point for me, and I think it's time to start tracking the journey again. Something tells me my life is about to pick up pace, and when I look back, I want to be able to relive every moment.

I had a huge 'ah-ha' moment in May. I'm not sure if it's something that God has been trying to get me to understand for years, or if it's just that I was finally in the place he wanted me to be, so that I could finally see. Either way, doesn't really matter, just an interesting reflection. Either way, my eyes were finally opened that little bit more and my life has been changed forever. Isn't it amazing how God works?

So, what was my great revelation? It was the simple fact that God does all the hard work!

How many times have I read that Jesus says 'my yoke is easy and my burden is light' (mt 11:28-30)? But now I realize that these are not just nice, feel good words. Jesus puts action behind his words. He stands behind them. How complicated I have made my life, how much stress I have brought upon myself.

Suddenly, I really listened to a sermon and God showed me that it doesn't matter where I work, it doesn't matter where I live - he is in charge of all that and will make sure that I am where I am supposed to be. My job is to get up each day and focus only on that day. Forget about yesterday and tomorrow. As long as I do what God has set before me to do today, I will look back fondly on my yesterdays and my tomorrows will sort themselves out when they get here.

Okay, sounds good, but what does that mean?

Well, it means that I need to start each day on time. I need to get up and spend time with God - reading my bible and praying. I need to ask God to show me my tasks for the day. Some are straightforward and do not really change. For example, Monday to Friday, I need to get up and go to work. While at work, I need to focus on my job and do my best. That is all. As long as I am working to the best of my ability, it doesn't really matter what gets done and what has to wait for tomorrow. God will work that out because he has purposefully set me in that job. And if that's not where he wants me to be, he will move me to the right place. I now realize I don't have to worry about it, that's God's job.

Okay, but I'm a Christian in a secular workplace, so that's pressure right? Isn't it my job to always be on my best behaviour so that people will see Christ through me? The bible talks about all that 'fruit of the spirit' stuff. God has given me a huge responsibility, hasn't he? Well, here is the best part of what I learned - no that's God's job too. I don't have to WORK at demonstrating the fruit of the spirit. As long as I'm getting up and doing the tasks already outlined above, the Holy Spirit will work in me - because I've invited him to - and he changes me from the inside out. He creates the fruit of the spirit in me, day by day.

Okay, so there is one more catch. There's always a catch, isn't there? But it's one that I can live with. The one other task that I have to do each day, is to not procrastinate. Anyone who really knows me (like my family) know that I'm very bad at putting things off. So that is my area of focus - to do things when I think of them, or when I'm shown by the Spirit. And that takes some prayer and focus, but so far it's been going pretty good. The first part is that I've set a time to get up each day and have made a point to do it. On days when it's a struggle, I get up and tell God it's a struggle, or I tell him I'm tired. I admit my weakness and ask God for help. And so far, each day, he has come though.

Take today as a example. I got up and while I was reading my bible, and focusing on the past week, the thought suddenly came to me that I need to pick up the blog again. Perhaps my life is about to pick up speed and I should be documenting it. Not really sure why that came to me, I haven't thought of this blog for a long time. It was 2007 when I last posted to it. But why doesn't matter, I don't need to worry about that. And then my next thought was that I have a busy day ahead and would think about doing that tonight. But then it started nagging at me - see it was my natural nature to procrastinate. But God knows me, he made me the way I am, after all. So it started nagging at me, to the point I realized I needed to do it now, so here it is - my first 'come back' post. Hopefully, and with God's help and blessing, it will be the first of many.

Midweek Praise Report

Ok, more very exciting news. DH was getting his timesheet signed, and his boss initiated a conversation about the upcoming changes. He specifically mentioned that he’d set up the proposal in such a way as to ensure that DH will be put into the management union, as opposed to the general union. We interpreted this as a great demonstration of the work God has been doing on his behalf, behind the scenes and out of our view. We have felt God’s hand all along on DH’s job situation, from him getting back in with his old employer to his elevated position, his hours of employment and of course all the negotiations for him to be unionized and permanent. Praise God! Thank you for your blessing and your hand upon our lives.

Weekend Update

Here’s a recap of last weekend, it was very full and very exciting.

It started off Friday night. After dropping DS off at his youth group. I dropped in at our local Christian bookstore. I wanted to pick up a copy of “Power of a Praying Parent”. Our church was selling this as an accompaniment to their prayer series. I felt led to pick it up then, but wasn’t at church the days they were selling it, so I figured I’d get it at the bookstore. I just love that store, the atmosphere is so calming and peaceful. I always sense God’s presence strongly there. Anyway, I picked up my book, but then stayed and lingered, taking in the ambiance and checking out other books. I came across a book “Becoming a Millionaire God’s Way” I think was the title. It was buried a bit, but the title jumped out at me. Just the thing DH would pick up, and I would be skeptical about. Anyway, I picked it up and looked at it. It was the last copy and was a bit banged up, so it had been marked down. All the earmarks of a great book for DH. But, as always I wrestled with myself about it. After all, if I bought it and gave it to him, then in a sense I’m endorsing it. And “what if the teaching is wrong”, I protested. Then what? But still I felt led to pick it up. So, in my usual wisdom, I opened the book to a random page and read. Ok, so that page was ok, so of course I had to try a couple more pages. Each time, what I was reading either reflected things I know to be true or resonated in some way with recent devotionals. Ok God, you finally convinced me, so I picked up the book. I also found a good book on prayer for DS. One of those that has prayers to get you started, listed by topic. This one was designed for teens and their issues. I think of all the times that I encourage him to pray about things, but often wonder if he really knows where to start. So, it seemed like a good book. I didn’t find anything for DD, but I know she has a couple of her own books on the go right now, so it just wasn’t meant to be.

I received the copy of my credit report that I’d requested and by the look of things everything will be cleared in a couple of months. The proposal will still show up, but it’s showing as settled and no issues. DH thinks there may be some things showing up on his that aren’t on mine. I’ve given him the forms to request a copy, so we’ll see. But I was very, very encouraged. I feel like this is our year of Jubilee – our 7th year. Which makes sense, because everything really fell apart in 2000, and that was when I turned to the Lord in desperation to help us out of the pit we’d dug ourselves into. Now, we’re into our 7th year, and it’s like God is giving us a clean slate and a chance to start over.

Financially, many things are scheduled to happen this year. First the credit clearing up, then there’s DH’s job. He had very good news about that this week, and it seems like it should be resolved relatively soon. When that happens, there is a possibility that we’ll come into a substantial sum of money, well substantial for us, anyway. I strongly feel that this is our testing period. How we handle this coming year and the added responsibility & freedom, will impact greatly on our future.
I told DH on Saturday that I wanted to sit down and talk to him about a couple of things. One was the finances, and how I’ve been feeling about everything lately. I wanted to talk to him about checking out a couple of financial advisors for guidance on the best way to handle any large influx of funds, and put our money to work the best we can.

The other thing that I wanted to discuss was him, was the whole Jabez thing and that I thought it would be good if we would both commit to it, so that we’re both on the same page. He was in agreement to both, and has started reading the Jabez book. All in all, it was a very relaxed and productive weekend. I spent a lot of time contemplating my Christian walk and listening for God’s voice.

The blessing of my partner in life and love

This morning as I spent time in prayer, I made a special point of praying for the kids today. Consequently, I was running out of time, and not wanting to leave my husband out of today's requests, I kind of hurriedly added him at the end, asking God to be with him and thanking the Father for the wonderful blessing that he is to me and the kids. My prayer time is spent in private, so he has now idea what I've prayed on any particular day.

Anyway, a little while ago, I received this email from my wonderful husband. What a blessing he is, indeed!! Thank you Lord!

I was listening to one of my favorite songs called a good heart by Fergal Sharky,

“A good heart
true love,
the lasting kind.
A good heart these days is hard to find”

Then I got to thinking, how true it is to find a good heart, most people I know are still searching.

“I hear a lot of stories
I suppose they could be true
All about love and what it can do to you”

Then I got to thinking how lucky I was to be one of the stories that really are true.
I have found a “good heart” in you.

Proverbs 31:10 A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies

All my Love, D.

The Jabez Effect - a journey begins...

Several years ago, our church family studied the prayer of Jabez. I don’t really remember seeing immediate changes, but I know that the period following was one of my most active and rewarding as a Christian. I’m not sure if I ever connected the two events, but as I have been reflecting over the past week or so, I now realize the effect one had on the other, and the results I experienced from the study and incorporating the Prayer of Jabez into my life.

Unfortunately, it was a short-lived activity at the time, and I must confess that eventually over time my Christian walk has settled back into a much more boring routine. Oh, God is in my life, but over the past few years it has certainly lacked the urgency and dynamic that it had during the time after the study. Not that my walk isn’t good, but it’s not GREAT like it was.

These days I’m in a new church and lately the focus has again turned to prayer. For the first few weeks, it all seemed pretty routine and not much I hadn’t already learned and put into practice. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no prayer warrior, that’s not my special gift by far, but I learned early the value of prayer and that God does in fact answer our prayers, so conversing with God has always been a part of my Christian life. I was fortunate to have good teachers when I first became a believer – this was a gift from God.

Anyway, back to the present. The sermons have gotten deeper, and I’ve been taking them in, making a renewed commitment to set aside time on a daily basis, as well as making an effort at journaling my prayers. Definitely not a strong point of mine! Then, as I’ve been praying and focusing, I remembered the Jabez prayer, and decided to get my book out.

For anyone who’s not familiar with this, there was a book done by Bruce Wilkinson regarding a small section in I Chronicles. Actually only 2 verses, but Jabez prays to God the following prayer and the bible records that God heard him and answered his prayer. The prayer itself consists of 4 parts, and basically asks God for blessings and prosperity. When we first started studying it, I was a bit uneasy, as it smacked to me of the old “name it, claim it” game. But when you really study it, you soon will realize that you’re not necessarily asking God for monetary blessings. In fact, you’re simply asking God to use you and to strengthen you, to help you do his work.

So, I’ve made a commitment to incorporate the requests that Jabez made into my own prayer time, and to set aside a specific time each day for prayer for the remainder of 2007. Here on my blog, I will record the results and we will see what happens. Actually, I’m very excited because I know how short the time I did this was last time, and I now know the results that came from that.

Note: In honor of the author, I’m not going to detail any more about the prayer itself. But I've posted the link to the author’s web site. It’s a very short book ~ 8 chapters in all ~ and comes in a variety of versions. I’d encourage anyone interested to pick up a copy. I also know from experience that when we read a book, God speaks to each of us differently, so the lines that may have impacted me the most, may have a different effect on you. Bottom line – buy the book!

Update

Wow, I can't believe a year has passed since I posted. Much has happened and my life has taken a whole new direction. Years of prayer around DS's education were answered. He is now in a terrific program for high school and he is doing great! Went from failing to getting 92% on his science final exam. Still waiting for final 1st semester report card , but mid-term marks were all great!

DD has found a direction for her life - looking to go to university to become a teacher. There is still a lot that needs to fall into place, but I am confident that God is with her and will guide her in the ways that are best.

The biggest impact this has had is to make us realize that it's God's plan to have us stay right where we are.
We are expecting a major change ~ or maybe I should say upgrade ~ in DH's job. It has been moving slowly, but will come in God's time. Already there have been changes for the better, but I am confident that he is where God wants him and he's going to blow it out of the water.

Onward & Upward

Well, D has had lots of news. First about the bank, he met with them and they took all the details. It’s been passed upwards for approval and they were supposed to get back to us yesterday, but so far no news. D claims that no news is good news, since it means we haven’t been turned down yet. I however, am more pessimistic and think that no news is definitely NOT good news. But it’s not like I’m worried about it. I know that it is all in God’s hands and if the financing with TD does not come through, then it’s not meant to be. There are other banks, or maybe we’re not supposed to get financing at this time. God has definitely been moving us away from more debt, so it’s a good possibility. On the surface it would be a setback, but if we’re meant to move, then it’s up to God to make it happen. And he will, but in his own perfect way. So, on one hand I’m anxious to know the answer, but not stressed or anything over it.

D has also had very big news about his new-old job. It looks like there may be a promotion in the works, as well as a move to a full government unionized job. It would mean a job with full benefits and job security. I’ve always felt that he would eventually be made a government employee, but now it looks like it’s really going to happen within the next year to year and a half. They’ve also promised a cost of living increase as of April. If everything goes through the way it’s shaping up, he will definitely be making more than I am at present. Which again, I’ve felt God really urging me that my job has to take a backseat to D’s, and that it’s time for him to be in the lead. Amazing how everything works out.

Oh well, that’s the news. Like I said yesterday, it seems the mission is picking up again. I dropped off the package, turns out it was for unit 80. They spoke English and were quite thankful that I’d taken the time and effort to deliver the package. That was all for the time being, no real opportunity to talk, but again it’s in God’s hands and we all know that he can do miracles with very little – like a couple of fish and loaves of bread…

A New Year ... A new update

February 1, 2006

Well I haven’t written since before Christmas. A lot has happened, but not that much with regards to the mission. Christmas has come and gone, and a new year started. Much like the old year, if the truth be told.

The focus has been away from the mission and more on other matters like the family’s health. J has been diagnosed and is doing better. The adjustment to her meds has been relatively smooth, for which we are really thankful.

Both Mom E and Carm have quit smoking, as well as Shar. 2 directly because of Mom D, and Carm for reasons of her own. I’ve made a commitment to exercise and eat better, mainly in the hopes of losing weight, but also for the future of my health. I’ve joined the gym and signed up for 10 weekly sessions with one of the trainers. I’m into week 3, sore but encouraged. There are days it’s really difficult and eating better is always a challenge, but I must persevere.

Portico is going in a new direction for the new year. I am amazed as always at how it mirrors my own devotional messages. I’ve also taken advantage of the new year to address my spiritual health. I’ve been doing daily devotions, picked up a good book and dragged one of my books on prayer out as well. Again, I’m making progress. It’s encouraging to hear the messages reflected back from the pulpit as well. I know that God is with me and is guiding me. The focus over the past few weeks has been the “power of everyone” and a concerted effort for all in the congregation to tithe. God has shown me that we need to be tithing on our gross, so I’ve been implementing that.

And now we’re into February… and the mission seems to be stepping up again. D has renewed his friendship with C & S. We’re going with them to New York for the big toy show in a couple of weeks. Talk about a mission field right there. Then earlier this week we had a package delivered to us that is for one of the neighbours. I need to contact them and find out their unit so I can deliver it to them. Another possible outreach. These things I leave in God’s hand. I make the initial contact and let God lead where he will.

In January we went and saw Narnia with D & M, and then out to dinner. It was nice to get back together with them. I’ll need to follow up, maybe this weekend.

So God is constantly opening doors in our present location, and we finally got the final papers from the trustee, so hopefully things will pick up again with the move. D has his meeting with the bank today, so that should be interesting.

Steps 2 and 3

Well, Friday was a memorable day. The final trustee payment went through as did the $2K payment to D's mom. Two big items that are now closed. We have to make one more $2K payment to D's mom, for money that she lent us when D started his new-old job. That will most likely happen when we get the line of credit to pay off the 2nd mortgage. I guess those will be steps 4 & 5, but that is in God's hands to decide. I'm just very thankful to have made it through these 2!

D spoke with the trustee last week and they advised we should have the discharge papers 2 weeks after the payment is processed - step 2B! We need that to proceed with the bank.

And now it's Monday, a new week and new challenges await. We're getting into the Christmas rush and there's lots to do. But I've started my shopping and things are moving along nicely. The weekends are starting to get busier with holiday and family plans. More about that later, now I have to get ready for work and see if I can get into the dentist for an emergency appointment. One of my fillings ( a large front one) fell out in my sleep last night. I am being good and following God's previous guidance by taking better care of my teeth. Previously, I've waited until my teeth cause pain before going, but this time I know it will be serious and I need to take immediate care of it.

More later ...

A Remarkable Sunday Service

We had the most unusual service today at Portico. The passage was from Joshua and Pastor Doug taught on how the Israelites defiled themselves by one person stealing items that had been consecrated to God, and as a result the battle was lost and the Israelites are found fleeing in retreat. Pastor Doug expounds to say that that was the obvious cause of their defeat, but not the only one. They also did not pray or consult God for direction prior to going into battle.

God answers Joshua by instructing the Israelites to cleanse themselves and then come forward into God’s presence. Here is where the service becomes unique. The pastoral team, represented by Pastor Doug, and the church elders proceeded to put the sermon into practice by presenting themselves and the congregation to God in a prayer of confession and forgiveness. It was a beautiful prayer, written out for the congregation to follow. Upon completion of the prayer, they consecrated it by holding communion.

This is the only time I can ever remember the church pastors and elders coming together publicly during the main service to confess and ask forgiveness for corporate sins of the church. It was incredibly moving and inspiring.

One more step

Well, we've accomplished one more step, and there should be another one any day now. We picked up the remaining $2K from the 2nd mortgage last night. The crook tried to weasel out of it, even though he's 2 months overdue in paying it. When he first held back the $2K, we were told by the broker and the lawyer that it was because our carpets need to be replaced, and so if we defaulted on the mortgage, he would have to replace the carpets before selling. Looking back now, I realize that this is crazy, because if we'd defaulted, the bank would have paid him out the way they did the taxes and the condo fees last time. The bank has the biggest iterest in our home and we have huge equity in our home, even with the 2nd mortgage.

Anyway, yesterday the tune changed and now he's trying to tell us he held it back because we were behind in the condo and taxes, but that really wasn't the case either because the bank had paid them. I think we were originally behind 2 condo fees, but again those HAD to be up to date BEFORE they'd give us the 2nd mortgage. Like I said, he's a crook. So, sure enough yesterday, he had us jumping through hoops, proving the mortgage, the condo fees and the taxes were all up to date before he'd sign over the $2K. Now remember, we've been paying interest on these funds that we never even had for 8 months now. And every payment has gone through absolutely fine. And should, heaven forbid, one of our payments at any time bounces, he put it in our contract that it's a $500 fine - on a payment of $301!!! So, once again, I say he's a crook. And that's the price we've paid for not relying in God sooner.

But, thanks to God's grace, we are up to date with all of those things, and we haven't had any problems, so we were able to get that backup within less than an hour. Now we finally have our $2K, which we had borrowed at the time from D's mom. So now she has a cheque and that chapter will be another one closed.

Next step - final payment for the Trustee should go through any day now. I'll have to have D follow up today to see why it hasn't gone through yet.

Thank you Lord, without you we wouldn't have our house and wouldn't be making progress towards our new mission.

The Neighbourhood

It's Wednesday morning and I got up a bit earlier than usual, but will still be rushing by the time I have to leave. It's always the same, the more time I have, the more I waste.

Last night was my last cooking session with the kids until after Christmas. Next week is a party night, and I'm helping out with that and then we're off until Christmas. It ended up being a lot of fun and I've said I'll do it again for the next session. I've made some new acquaintances as well. Who knows what friendships lie around the corner? God has been making me more aware of my lack of close everyday friends lately. I have friends, but most of them are more distant and I don't have people to talk to about day to day things. I know that if he's making me aware of something, then it's about to change!

The condo meeting ended up being a real brawl. Some young hot-head and his wife are trying to kick our present management out. It's so ridiculous, but it's also quite scary to see how much influence one couple can gather. Even some people that I've thought of a quite reasonable have been influenced. Thankfully our present management are calm and level-headed. In the end, we had the result we wanted, but I'm sure we're in for more trouble over the next few months.

At the end of the day, I was quite upset. I know that God is leading us towards another path, but there are many people who've lived here for years and this is their home. It's also our home, and has been for 12 years. I don't want to see some young yahoo's come in, upset everything and then move out a year or two later.

With all the emphasis on our neighbourhoods at church, I've been thinking about it more. I really don't know my neighbours here and have not felt God urging me to get to know them better. However, after Monday's meeting I now have more direction. I think there are a few specific families that he's telling me to get to know more, and I definitely know that I have to start praying for our development - actively praying! There are a lot of believers in here, and I know that God is watching over us and protecting us. That was evident in the outcome of the meeting.

With regards to finances, once again God came through and worked out a difficulty. I had faith that he would, but am still amazed at how he works. The last trustee payment is set to go through this week. What a great feeling it will be to have that resolved.

Also, the "crook" who gave us our 2nd mortgage (long story) owes us the $2000 holdback. He should have given us that money October 1st and we still haven't seen it. I've been pushing D to get that resolved, so hopefully I can put that behind us as well. Once the Consumer proposal has been disposed, we can look at redoing our present mortgage and clearing off the 2nd mortgage. That will also be a happy day. Right now we're throwing away $300/month just on interest!!

{To be fair, we got ourselves into the mess in the first place, and we had not choice in the 2nd mortgage if we wanted to keep the house. We knew we'd be making the interest payment each month, and I wouldn't have even minded the holdback except for the way the guy ended up doing business. He knew he had us over a barrel and took advantage of us. He put ridiculous clauses in the contract and sprung the holdback on us at the last minute. I don't like people who do business like that. Be up front and respectful. Yes, the mortgage helped us, but we ended up doing business with a crook}. Another chapter I'll be happy to learn from and put behind us.

Just another Manic Monday

The weekend retreat went well. The retreat center was ok, but not great. The setting was nice and the rooms were comfortable. But they seemed to only have double rooms (2 twin beds). I was lucky enough to have a room to myself, but other places I’ve been to give you the option when booking for single or double rooms. My other major complaint was that there were no locks on any of the rooms. When I’m away on a retreat, I don’t want to have to worry about carrying around my purse all the time. Also, I had a number of valuables with me, such as my iPod and speakers. Not something you want to just leave in an open room for the day.

The food was okay, but not spectacular. Again, other places I’ve been offer really “homemade” food. When you’re out in a nice rural setting, it’s nice to have good old-fashioned home cooking. There food was ok, but a bit processed for my liking.

But, overall the retreat was really great. People were open and got to know each other a bit better. Quite a few people only came up for the Saturday, but we still had a good group.

I picked up some great chicken slippers. They’re ohhh so soft, and really cute. I’ve wanted great big fluffy slippers for a long time, but haven’t been able to find ones that I like for a reasonable price. Walmart, $15. Everyone got a great kick out of them on the retreat.

It’s the condo meeting tonight. Should be interesting. The fees have gone up a LOT over the past year, and maintenance has been slipping. I was talking to J.J. today and she mentioned that there was a group of owners around back, I think B.M. is one of them, who are interested in taking over the Board from Wpond. D and I would be opposed to that. There are things we’re not thrilled about, but still think Wpond at the very worst is the better of 2 evils. We’ve seen what happens when owners get too involved in making the board decisions and it’s not pretty.

On another note, I did up the budget today, and tried to allot funds more realistically, including funds designated for food and gas. This month, as with every month, will be tight and we need to stick to the budget. With God’s help and guidance, it can be done. I’ve also sent it to D and let him know what I can pay out of the regular budget and what he will need to account for out of his Paypal funds. Hopefully this will help us keep on track too.

Oh well, work day is over now and time to head home, make dinner, then head out for our meeting. Another day done, and another day closer to Christmas….

The Week In Review

I know, I know, I haven’t written in a while. Not too much has happened over the past week – just the usual busy stuff. Money went haywire, but seems to be back in control now. Same old problem, thinking we have funds and spending without keeping track, only to find out that we’ve now overspent and are in trouble.

I know that God has instructed me that I need to make a more defined budget, including all items including food, gas, etc. As it is right now, I keep track of the bills and payments that I need to make, and then whatever is left over can be used for the daily stuff. But this isn’t working, because as soon as we get paid, we’re buying the things we need and then there isn’t enough at the end of the day.

This weekend is the Alpha retreat. Last Saturday’s Alpha was a really good discussion. I like being part of a more advanced group, it’s just odd being the only female in the group. I’m looking forward to getting away for the weekend and spending time alone with God. A nice quiet weekend to refresh and refocus. I hope that there will be a fair amount of quiet, alone time built in, but am a bit nervous as I really don’t know many of the other women in the program. I’m also not sure if I’ll have a room to myself or will be sharing with someone else. There are pros and cons to both, but I think overall I’d prefer a private room. But then again, it might be nice to bond with another woman. I haven’t done that for a while, probably not since I went away with L. on our Alpha retreat. So, God, I leave it in your hands – I know that you know what is best for me, and for anyone else as well.

I had some good news about L. this week She’s found a new job and is working right next door – in my old building for CGI. Now we’ll be able to get together for lunch occasionally. I really want to hook her up with J, since they go to the same church and now work in the same building. I think they’d get along well together.

Friday was R’s birthday, as well as D’s Mom’s. We took K out for dinner on Friday, as R was out at a youth group event for the evening. Saturday the whole family went to see Chicken Little (R’s choice) and then out for dinner afterwards. All in all, I think R had a good birthday, but it was a little sad for us as both kids are now officially teens. No more babies at home :-(

Halloween

Ok, now normally I use Halloween as a chance to be out and about in my neighbourhood. I know there's this big controversy and everything among Christians about it being the devil's day and all that. And certainly I am very sensitive to allowing influences from the spirit realm into our lives and the easy danger that can be. But when it comes to Halloween, I remember all the innocent fun I had with my brothers when I was a kid. As far as I am concerned, our kids have lost too much already. They can't play outside after school with the carefree attitude that we had, our world is much too dangerous for that these days. So, I say let them have what fun they can while they're young.

That said, this year I find myself suddenly so busy, and D ended up having to work both Sunday night and pulling a 12 hour shift on Monday, so he certainly wasn't around to help. J was going to a friend's house, as usual. Which left me, R and "the dog" on our own for the evening. Alone with a house to decorate, candies to buy, candies to shell out - and we normally get 100-150 kids coming around in the space of about 1-1/2 hours, as well as R to take around for his own trick or treating.

Have I intorduced you to "the dog" yet? I don't think so. He's a great big hulking thing - a cross between a german shepherd and a great dane. He looks like a shepherd, but has the dane deep chest and huge clunky feet. And he doesn't slope down in the back the way a shepherd does. Add to that doberman/rotti coloring on his face. You know, the black face with brown spots above the eyes? Overall he has a laid-back dane personality. A real pillow dog - until the doorbell rings, that is. Then he's a full blooded shepherd, guarding his flock from intruders.

So, that said, you can possibly see my dilema. Do I take R out trick or treating, and not give out candy myself and have the dog a nervous wreck by the time I get home, or do I make R stay home with me? The big question!

Well, I decided on neither. I decided to take a novel approach and bribe my son to forgo his trick or treating delight for this year. Instead, I offered him a trip to our local Walmart and $20 in hand to spend at his leasure. Whamo - a hit.

So, on Monday night I loaded the dog, R and myself into our minivan, drove off to the bank for funds, then to our local dog park so that the dog could have a nice run and get all his pent up energy out. We all donned our halloween finest - orange shirts all around - yes even the dog has an orange t-shirt. A couple of years ago Old Navy used to sell doggie t-shirts. They've discontinued them sadly, but they were the only canine garment I could find that would fit. So the dog has his orange "canine university" t-shirt and his green "12 dogs of Christmas" t-shirt. But I digress. Anyway, we took the dog for a run, then headed off to Walmart for an evening of fun browsing and shopping.

It ended up being a hit. R had a great time picking out some toys, we grabbed a bite afterwards and all in all it was a fun time spent with my son. And, I've heard from a couple of other mom's with sons around the same age, that the idea was a hit with them too. Maybe I've started a trend??!??

Relection

As I reflect on what I’ve just posted, it becomes very clear that there was no mention of any worship or devotions throughout the week. Guess the enemy was successful this week. Now I’m starting to understand why my spirit’s being encouraged to maintain this blog. Maybe if I’d written earlier, I’d have noticed the lack of God in my week. Oh well, I obviously need to adjust my focus, no wonder I’m feeling frazzled this week …